*** BOSTON'S ONLY
REDUNDANT NEWS SOURCE FOR NEWS ***
October 8, 1998
Volume II, Number 3
Judge Judy
rules in Thomas case
In a move that galvanized Constitutional law theorists nationwide, Judge Judy handed down
her opinion in Thomas v. Thomas yesterday. Unconvinced by arguments made in the defense of
11-year-old Denise Thomas — and weary of her "lip" — Judy found Denise
guilty of "wrongful parakeet death" and awarded pecuniary damages to her twin
sister Melissa.
Bee-keeping the faith in
Chelmsford
At the end of a long, winding gravel road in Chelmsford, there sits a bee farm. You
wouldn’t even know it was there, except for two ominous signs: one, a weathered metal
sign that says "No Trespassing"; and another, which merely reads, in block
letters four inches high, "Caution: Bees."
"I Can’t
Believe It’s Not Birth Control" debuts
Citing a rise in unwanted pregnancies, Fakin’ It, makers of the top-selling butter
substitute "I Can’t Believe It’s Not Butter," launched a new product
line of birth control remedies based on old-wives tales and cultural myths.
ART brings in das Brecht, das funk
