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August 13, 1998
Volume CVI, No. 24

MTV wraps up "Real World: Calcutta"
MTV has just finished shooting on a new season of "The Real World," this time set in Calcutta, India.

Texas secedes from itself
Last night at 3:30 p.m. EST, Texas seceded from itself and disappeared, leaving a gap in the space-time continuum. One federal witness described the event as "a large poof."

Publisher bemoans lack of 'big names'
HarperCollins today announced a series of drastic cuts from its fiction section. Many prominent writers have been let go, said Literary Editor John Garen, because of their "lame-ass" names.

The brotherhood under the bridge
Nationwide, fraternal organizations appear to be on the wane. But many students still look to these groups to anchor their social lives during their formative college years.  A case in point: University of Cincinnati sophomore Andy Fleck.

IMF bails out Melrose man
Johnny Lucantoni had problems. His credit cards were run up to their limits. And his car payments were two months behind.  But Lucantoni’s problems have been solved — for the moment, at least — thanks to a $7 billion loan from the International Monetary Fund.

Scientists: Germans #1 in beach horseplay

Weekly Week Educator Profile
Rick Hannigan: One Big Pederast